BROKEN HOME

Home signifies a family bonded by blood, love, and trust. It could be a combination of all three factors or just one. However, for the sake of eloquence, let’s stick to the traditional family—a unit bonded by blood.

A Family is the cornerstone of our Society. In pre-modern societies alike, it has been seen as the most basic unit of social organisation, and one that carries out the vital task of providing and protecting a Home. A Home in its dictionary form is a permanent residence for an individual or group, especially as a member of a family or household.

However, a home also signifies a unit of persons who are bonded by blood, Love, Trust and Respect, which spurs out from the central point of Agreement and Understanding. It is most times connected to a Family. It constitutes a bond of peace, comfort, unconditional love and warmth. This indicates that a Home is not just a "Place of Dwelling" in itself, but a deep connection of hearts and minds of a family bonded in unity.

Marriage, as we know it, has been instituted since 2350 BC, and has been accepted in most part of the world. However, there have never been a greater number of broken homes and marriages in history as we have come to know today. Why is there an increased number of divorce? After people swore for "better for worse on the altar, and till death do us part". Where does it all go wrong?

A broken home, on the other hand, depicts the division of a Family as a result of disagreement, misunderstanding, insensitivity to the needs of the Family, and more. A broken home often leads to the disruption of family values which directly or indirectly negatively affects a child. 

Many times often, the lives of children caught in the web of divorce are the ones who suffer the consequences of the actions of their parents. Here I will discuss the many reasons why homes are broken, how do you know if your marriage is headed there, and the possible ways you can remedy a broken home.

Causes of a Broken Home

These causes may emanate from one or more of the following reasons like incompatibility between spouses, infidelity, financial instability. Perhaps, the most important factor in the increase in marital breakdown in the 21st century is as a result of the greater acceptance of Divorce.

Sociologically, there is no society without social problems. A Broken Home is one of such problems, and it has various Negative effects on a Child's Development. These effects include the destabilisation of the child's personality and moral development.

A Child is like an Organ or a System that depends on other systems to survive ( Mother and Father) working collectively in harmony to ensure stability at Home. Furthermore, I have to say that there are no justifiable reasons for a Broken Home because there is always a solution to any marriage crisis. Nevertheless, let's dive into the possible causes for "Balance" on this Subject Matter.

1)Incompatibility

This Poses a Huge threat to most Homes leading to clashes or misunderstanding between a couple who didn't acquire the needed knowledge on the right process or principles of marriage before entering into a Life-Long commitment with their spouse. It usually points to the issue of difference in value systems, moral codes and beliefs, which brings about an intense disagreement between the Couple that can possibly lead to Divorce, which is disheartening.

2)Infidelity

This is another Strong Point that results to a broken homes. It is painful to discover that most Homes do not adhere or hold a "Positive Family Value" which causes several complications ranging from distrust, unfaithfulness, dishonesty. This paints a picture of a home without a clear understanding of one other. Unfortunately, some homes don't have a clearly defined meaning of what faithfulness really means and as such are not willing to abide by it.

3)Financial Instability

When we critically examine some Homes in our Society, we discover that some couples have succumbed to the idea of abandoning their Homes for "Greener Pastures". In most cases, the Parents during the times of financial crisis are faced with complicated issues that are too overbearing that either of the partners will decide to leave the family to have an extramarital affair on the basis of financial liberty especially for a family without core family values which is extremely consequential. Also, major differences in habits and beliefs about how money should be spent are not hashed out or planned to avoid financial complications.

THE REMEDY

In view, to the reasons outlined, we have discovered the basic issues some homes face resulting to a Split. The aftermath effects are very dangerous to be ignored. Therefore, important strategies or plans should be put in place to remedy the situation which I have decided to point out.  Although I know there are more but let's just look at these Few Basic Points;

-WILLINGNESS TO RECONNECT

There has to be a willingness to make things right before what was  ``Broken" can be ``fixed". The Consciousness to pick up the pieces of the Home and build it back should first be developed in order to be able to Reconnect as a Family again. The Family can reconnect by determining to recreate beautiful memories and correct the mistakes that were made. In this case, good counselling can help such a Broken Home to an extent by receiving essential guidelines and advice on the process of Reconnection.

-REFOCUSING ON FAMILY

This is a very important factor most Homes neglect. Refocus in this context is once again, paying attention to the needs and welfare of the family such as physical, psychological, financial, spiritual, and academic aspects of the family. There is a great responsibility on the shoulders of the parents to build a sustainable bond in their Home by instilling the right family value system like Trust and Faithfulness, create a good communication link amongst everyone in the family to strengthen the bond of the family, share ideas and thoughts to develop the minds of the children, build listening skills, create an atmosphere for open-mindedness and make out time for family vacation for recreational purpose.

-TEAMWORK

A Team inculcates cooperation and unity to achieve a Common Goal which is a key factor to build a Suitable Home. Parents should have One Mind in achieving peace at home by following the guiding principles and family values as a template for Cooperation at Home. This will help build the bond of the family because everyone will understand his or her responsibility in building a Blissful Home.

Financial Stability should be put into consideration whereby budgets, family planning as regards finance should be clearly stated, good saving and investment culture and habits should be inculcated in the Children as well. Parents should give keen attention to the children in every aspect and in turn, the Children must Respect and Honour their Parents. This explains that both Parents and Children have a Key Role to play in fostering and building a Blissful Home. 

In Conclusion, we should know that every Broken Home can be fixed if the right processes and principles are followed. Let's strive to build a Sustainable Home in our Society.

©Zina Kalio ( Writer_Zik)